"It is love alone that gives worth to all things." -St. Teresa of Avila

So this weekend was pretty great. Saturdays are work days in India if I haven't said that before. So when I say weekend, I actually mean Sunday. In the morning I went with Christine, an Indian lady who works for pro-world, to mass. Although, it was completely in Hindi I still enjoyed it. I was surrounded by a huge church full of Christians and (as dumb as I realize this is about to sound) I was comforted to be around so many people who believed in the same thing I did.

 For anyone who has never traveled outside the US or been a Christian where Christianity is not the norm, you really wouldn't know what I'm talking about. Being there for me felt like home, even though I only had interaction with a nice old nun who reminded me of Mother T (during one of the hymnal songs, she fixed my sari in the back where it was twisted . And yes, that's never a sentence I thought I would write). I felt happy even though, It was 8 am and I was rather hungry. Anyone who knows how I operate, feel free to be baffled at how that could be possible. I came home, took an hour nap (in my sari haha) and then went with my host mom and dad to a free clinic my host dad was running at my school. My two friends Hisa and Jeselene went with me which was nice. Basically they put me to work rotating which kids still needed check ups and which were already done. I even took one of the boys that can partially see, Kamlesh, and we found 5 other boys who were hiding in the hostel from the check ups. Im pretty sure those kids saw me as like the clinic police, but Kamlesh and I we're dying laughing as we hauled the boys to Dr. Sareen.

My day ended with a trip to Old City with Jeselene and Alyssa. We went to a pool on the rooftop of a super nice hotel. It overlooked the water and the city on the other bank of the river. It was pretty sweet. Also, Indian dress rules don't apply at swimming pools which is excellent. Everything is just normal. Even though I didn't bring a bathing suit I made due with a sports bra and athletic shorts. Sitting in a cold pool on a hot day in India is one of the most satisfying experiences in the world. You should try it sometime.  As wonderful as my weekend was, today I was faced with yet another hard reality. I have loved my boys at the school. Seriously. I cannot say a bad thing about any one of them (well maybe I could reprimand Kishan for always wanting to take pictures on my iPhone, but that's hardly a make-or-break problem). Some teachers, however, I am struggling to deal with.

Virenji absolutely loves the boys. You can tell this by the way he interacts with them, talks about them, and all he does for them. Although it is slightly different than we would consider in America of someone in his position (like affection for example), by Indian standards he's like Ghandi to these boys. I guess this next fact really shocked me because since all the teachers are blind... I figured they would want to be there too and would love the kids like Virenji does... However, today I learned that isn't the case with all of them. Here is what happened. I was sitting on the bench with the guy who works in the office (just to clarify, he isn't blind. I also am not 100% sure on how to spell his name. So for now he is office guy) and one of the older boys came to the lobby with sunglasses on. I was laughing and told them they were "acha" (good/nice) when the office guy stopped me and told me to look. The boy's left eye was bleeding heavily. The office guy told me it was infected and he was going to the hospital... Which I thought was weird because there was the free clinic the day before.

 The office guy said "He never takes care of it or washes it after he plays outside so of course it got infected." His English is vey good, but he sometimes comes off really harsh. By sometimes I mean a lot. I thought about his statement for a second and said "Well, has anyone ever told him he needed to, explained hygiene to him, or showed him how?" Office guy looked around at the teachers sitting close to us and replied "Well, no. These teachers are hired to only teach their subjects." "Well wouldn't that be something that they would say anyway to them, since it's something they would need to learn?" I asked. I guess I assumed this cause I have this idea that all children should be taught certain things, like how to keep yourself clean and healthy. Idk, maybe this is a first world idea.  "Well," he started. "I don't think it's the teachers' responsibility. Most are here for a paycheck. See Farook over there?" and he motioned to a guy who stops in every day from his motorcycle. He is considered a comedian and all the kids adore him. "He cares about the kids. So does Virenji."  I  didn't ask him if he cared too. I knew he did.

 He did, or he wouldn't think to even tell this to me. And the look in his eyes was a familiar one. Really passionate teachers have it, older siblings have it, social workers have it, mothers have it, youth ministers like Dustin F and Jeff P have it, and my father has it. Only people that really love children have it. I knew office guy, while he never really said it, loved every single one of these blind boys. He went on to say that some of their parents didn't care about them either. They drop them off at the school and leave them there for others to care care of them. This was around the time my eyes started watering because the smallest boy at the school, Amrit, came around the corner with a HUGE precious grin lighting up his face. I couldn't imagine anyone not wanting him.

 A week ago, I was frustrated slightly because I didn't have a concrete project I was working on. The school seemed disorganized and questions about America were starting to wear on me (How much does your house cost? What about your car, iphone, etc? Are boys still worth more than girls there? Are there blind people in high ranking jobs? When are you and Brenton to be married? Oh so you two aren't arranged to be married?) However, after what office guy said today, I am no longer frustrated like I was. Don't get me wrong, some of the teachers love the kids and want to do a good job. I absolutely love two of the teachers in fact and have been invited/gone to both of their houses. Then some sit forever in the teachers lounge while their entire classroom is waiting patiently in another room. I cant speak Hindi so I know even though I want to, I know I could never be as helpful as these teachers. My purpose here is to love these kids. Plain and simple. That could mean playing with them, trying my best when teach me Hindi, walking with them to the hospital if they get sick (like I did one boy today), playing ice water, or merely just walking down the halls calling them by name. It's not much, but it's all I can really do. But maybe that's enough. Maybe I'm here to do my best at loving them.  This coming weekend, I'm going to the Taj Mahal and then Dehli with Jeselene!!!!!! We arranged everything with a travel agent today. I'll most likely write before I leave. Until then